Campus Coffee Machine
Don’t worry this isn’t a rant. It’s more a description of the campus coffee machines that kept me alive through my college years. During the colder months of my time of higher learning I spent the first few minutes on campus shivering in front of the coffee machine. After putting in the same quarters multiple times the machine would prompt me for my selection; cappuccinos, coffee, hot chocolate. Then comes the full cup of half cup. Since I always like to think my cup is full and I can’t see paying $.10 less for half the coffee I always choose the full cup picture. At this point the machine spools up like a jet. It closes the blast shield as if one malfunction could cause me to lose my manhood. After some grunts groans and spits it goes silent. The blast door waits an exorbitant amount of time before raising the blast shield. I then proceed to grab the cup out and burn my fingers while unfolding the little paper handle. After sitting down I take the first sip, the paper handles flex just enough to spill coffee on my pants while the first sip enters my mouth and proceeds to burn the top layer of skin off my tongue.
The campus coffee machine. One of the few things that has tried to both save and kill me at the same time.